Admit it, you’re curious. Or, better yet, you’re downright experienced in the joys of plundering booty! Either way, you’re ready for an anal adventure. The butt is a wonderful erogenous zone, so allow us to teach you how to purchase a good anal plug, butt toy, or rear end dildo. Ready to be an anal pirate for Halloween? Ahoy! Let the fun begin, after the jump!
Ok, we’ll keep this simple.
1.) Begin with a good, thick lube. Yeah, yeah, I promised to help with toys, and here I am talking about lube again. But that’s what I do! Spit and butt sweat are not options, so be kind to your rear and lube it up. When it comes to ass play, too much lube is almost enough. You’ll want it on the toy, on your fingers, on both anal sphincters (muscle rings, and yes there are 2), and all over the darned place. Then you’ll want it on all of those places again. And again, a little later… repeat. Go with water based gels, high quality oil-based lubes, or silicones… but never mix a silicone lube with silicone toy! They fight. Really.
2.) Start small. Your eyes are bigger than your anus, I assure you. Yes, even you size queens know that you’ve made this mistake before! Start tiny. Think junior tampon or pinky finger sized, but don’t stick a tampon in your butt because they’re dry and scratchy (see point #1).
3.) Be smooth. You want a high quality toy that is absolutely smooth. So, if it has a weird seam or anything jagged you should be putting on your pants and running away. No fabrics or other materials that harbor bacteria either, and this includes seemingly smooth jelly rubber. Good materials include high grade silicone, Pyrex-style glass (toss immediately if cracked or chipped), smooth stone, specially treated wood, metal, or hard plastic. I shouldn’t need to tell you to keep it well-washed, so I’m not even going to mention it. For beginners I strongly suggest silicone, as it is nice and flexible yet easy to clean. Again, don’t mix a silicone toy with a silicone lubricant.
4.) Wider is better. Hey, I’m not talking about the insertable part, see number 2 for that one. I’m talking about that important flared base. Your butt muscles are strong and mighty. While your butt doesn’t really suck things up, the muscles can pull things in. With your fingers all slick (see #1), there is no way for you to keep a hold on that toy. Sure, you can squat and push in hopes that it will slip back out, but if it doesn’t then you’re in for a necessary-yet-embarrassing trip to the emergency room. Instead, buy a toy that is meant for your bum, whether it is a plug (which just stays in), a dildo (which can go in and out, or stay in), or a vibe (which can go in your nose… kidding!). The base should be far wider than the insertable part, like in the photo at the top of this post. That base is particularly nice, because even a lubricated finger can grasp it, but a wide and flat base will also do.
So there you go! Take it slowly and lovingly. Go back to point #1 often. Don’t expect it to necessarily be amazing your first time. Once you get warmed into butt play you will find that it really can enhance your solo and partnered intimate experiences. Looking for more info? Try the Babeland guide – here
Or, hurry up and register for my class on anal pleasure. It takes place in Atlanta later tonight, but you must register in advance. Find out how – here