Nov 252008
 

 

Patricia Lynn Shows Us Her Favorite Kink

Patricia Lynn Shows Us Her Favorite Kink

Patricia Lynn joins us today, to tell us about her love of being tied in beautifully decorative, provacitive and sexually vulnerable ways by her lover.  Her love of  Japanese rope bondage, also called Shibari, is a popular one.  Read on to hear her stories and suggestions!  As always, be sure to educate yourself further before you consider trying anything our interview.  Enjoy!

Please tell us, what is your fetish?
I enjoy shibari, the japanese art of exotic rope bondage.

How common do you think your fetish is?
I believe it is more common than most people think.  I have answered many questions about this on a human sexuality forum, and most people seem genuinely interested in the subject.

Does your fetish, or people who participate in it, have any catchy titles?

Rope bondage would be the most common term to date, but shibari, or kinbaku, are more accurate words.  Some use the term “rope slut” to describe a person who enjoys being tied up.

How do you incorporate your fetish into your sexual experiences?
My boyfriend likes to bind my wrists together in a simple two-column tie (I’m in the photo above).  We also have played with chest harnesses and breast bondage, both for foreplay and intercourse.

Is there anything you have to be particularly careful about with this fetish? If so, how do you handle it?
Binding any part of the body is potentially dangerous.  You can cut off circulation and cause permanent damage.  This is why communication between the top and bottom is so important – I need to tell my boyfriend if my fingers start to go numb.   We NEVER do shibari with the lights out – he wants to be able to see if the bound areas start to go dusky in color.

You also have to be careful if the bottom has a medical condition.  I would not recommend tying someone who is epilectic, for example.  It is recommended that a pair of EMT scissors always be kept on hand whenever experimenting with rope bondage, just in case there is an emergency.  Sometimes untying takes to long, and it is necessary to cut the ropes away.

What really works for you about this fetish, what aspects turn you on?
Well, first of all, the ropes seem to me to be an extension of his body – I feel as though I am wrapped tightly in his arms when he binds me.  I realize that sounds cliche, but it is true!

A big part of the appeal is trust.  I have to trust that my boyfriend is not going to do anything to me while I am bound that I would not like.  I have to trust that he will respect my safeword if I am pushed too far.  I could NEVER allow someone to bind me unless I had absolute trust in him.

And of course, there is the helpless feeling that being tied creates.  It can be an incredible turn-on!

Would you please tell us a story or two about sexual experiences you’ve had involving your fetish?
The first time he bound me, it was the tie shown in my picture – a simple two-column tie done in front of my body.  I had always fantasized about being tied up, and he was the first man I had dated who was comfortable with it (actually, he was eager to do it – he had been studying shibari long before we met).  I was amazed at the sense of rightness that flowed through me at the feel of the rope tightening around my wrists.  It felt like coming home!

We do not use rope every time we have sex – but we do use it a lot.  The last time he tied me my hand were behind my back – the helpless feeling was doubled, and I enjoyed myself imensely!

I have found that shibari has made me a more responsive lover – I climax far more often, and each climax tends to be stronger and longer than ever before.  I have also started having squirting orgasms, which feel incredible!

How do people react when you share your fetish with them, if anyone knows?
The first reaction is usually negative, but then it is followed almost immediately with facination.  The idea of being bound (or binding your partner) tends to resonate with almost everyone I have talked to.  I have even discussed this with my parents (they are open about sexual matters) and found that both of them enjoy it as well.  The fact that I am open to discussing shibari seems to make people comfortable with the subject.

How do you go about finding partners that share your interest?
I was lucky – my roommate brought my current boyfriend home because she thought he was cute!  She dated him for a while, but they had different sexual tastes, and broke up – although they are still on speaking terms.

So I have never gone out and actively searched for a person to bind me.  However, I am aware that most kinky websites are great places to go to meet like-minded people.  There are also shibari classes and meets around the world – search the web for more information.

I do know that ShibariCon is being held in Chicago in May – there will be many other shibari-lovers there.

Can you recommend any resources for people who want to learn more or might even share your fetish?
Here is the book my boyfriend used to start out – it is a great guide for how-to shibari

We both strongly recommend TwistedMonk (that is the source of all our rope).

Just googling the term “shibari photos” can bring up some beautiful and artistic photographs, they are lovely to look at. However, some of these may be unsafe for work, so I would search in the privacy of your own home.

Anything else you would like to add?
I tend to hang out at Topix.com…or you can email me at patricialynnlady@yahoo.com.

Thank you, Patricia Lynn!  It has been a pleasure reading and learning about your love of rope bondage with your partner.  If you are interested in contacting her respectfully, you can look for her at the link above.  You might also want to check out the how-videos by TwistedMonk – here

Read all of our Twisted Tuesday posts – here

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